Goodbye Randall, we will sure miss you.

          So, “Tim” and I have made amends. I think he has kissed enough ass to cover his indiscretion. Perhaps now he will judge a little under what he truly believes…I have been a nervous wreck all week. I have eaten until I am ashamed. I didn’t just fall off the wagon, I stole it, fell off and was ran over by both of the right sided wheels…and I may have eaten it as no further citing’s have been reported.

It started with a kidney stone (which I still have ownership of). The reason I still know it is there is not the pain….it is the sensation of pissing razor blades that alludes to its presence. The excruciating pain waxes and wanes, but the burn is always there. I am taking my Flomax (a medication for enlarged prostate, like I need that rumor started) and it seems to be helping. I only hope this passes on its own as the surgery and stents are worse than an STD (not that I know what an STD feels like…).

Work has been horrendous. On top of regular work we have been attending computer class. Going to a computer training class with 45 or so people to learn a new system is torture. I would rather spend that 4 hour block of my life being pursued by Anton Sugaar (No Country for Old Men) just as long as it was only for 4 hours. If you know who I’m talking about, you’ll realize how bad I hate class.

The reason I hate computer class so much is that I always seems to get in the same class as the people who still are unable to use a copy machine. The grandma’s of the world who don’t have smartphones. The old farts who still use their home phone numbers for shit. These are the people who utilize 85% of the instructor’s time and energy to get a few points across. The remaining 15% of us have already figured it out and are feeling particularly violent when granny brings up something we have already went over or gets lost. I was gritting my teeth so hard I’m sure I’ve done permanent damage from the last session and I get to do it all over again tomorrow.

We had a going away part for one of my co-workers Friday. Randall will be missed. I tried to take plenty of pictures at his going away party. I edited them as best that I could but Jeremy pointed out something that I had never noticed…He looks just like Quaker Oats guy, Wilford Brimley!! I could not believe the resemblance. Don’t ask him about his Diabeetus!

We wish him all the best, he deserves it. Like I said, it’s been quite a week. All of my children have tried my patience as a RESPONSIBLE parent this weekend. Cooper has been off the wall, bat shit crazy. He has toggled between wide open nuts and emotional. Kind of like me when I’m on my period but have been to Hobby Lobby and started a project. Charleigh Joe has pissed in every pair of panties she owns. She just came up to me and told me she was leaving and needed 3 dollars. Apparently she has developed a drinking problem which explains the incontinence. I gave her 6 and told her to get her brother one as well.

Why does life have to be so hard? Why can’t I just have all the answers? I waited all week to finish my homework and it was horrendous. Why did I do that? I have no idea why my mind works the way that it does. I just go with it. That is all I can do for now. I should be getting ready for tomorrow. Back to work I go, or computer class for the morning. I’ll probably be seated next to Jitterbug. I should probably take some Benadryl to slow my reactions. It has saved me before. Never underestimate the uses for antihistamines. They aren’t just for allergies.

 I looked at the weather and see that is should start snowing around 2300 tonight. I didn’t tell Jeremy, I didn’t feel like watching him break down. I’m going to be one happy girl when they cancel Spring Break for all these “snow days”. My husband and I will drop them all off at school and screw like spider monkeys. We will eat ice cream and watch TV, and laugh at how funny life really is. How we beat them at their own game. I wish.