Tuesday, January 13, 2015

Poor Tyrannosaurus Rex

         













 Well I can’t sleep. Whether it is the racing of thoughts through my head or more probably the realization of yet another flaw I cannot tell.  It has come to my attention that I am shaped like a T Rex. Large body with disproportionate arms. I saw one of the Tyrannosaurus Rex hates push-ups T shirts years ago but never really thought that much about it until lately. It seems that I am a T Rex reincarnated, and we know this does not end well.
          Because of his genetic flaws the Tyrannosaurus Rex does not fair very well.  Sure he is a bad ass for those who don’t realize that he can’t particularly use his upper body at all, which was a high percentage of other dinosaurs and unfortunately brains have developed faster than the T Rex’s arms and I am at a loss. I am going to list a few things that the TR hates:
1.     Push ups
2.    Belts
3.    Urinalysis collection
4.   Folding sheets
5.    Sweeping and/or mopping
6.   High shelves
7.   Arm wrestling
8.    Rock, paper, scissors (only 3 fingers)
9.    Washing window
Obviously the list could go on and on as you get the idea. Big body, abnormally small arms make for a nightmare in so many things but especially a finding a fitted blazer.  Now, this may not sound like much to you but it is something that really upsets me.

Why should I be given yet another hardship in trying to fit clothes to this misshapen body? I’ve got sticks like a Rockette, tits like a porn star, and the arms and torso of the mighty king of the dinosaurs. How does that seem fair? 

Yet just another example of how life is tilted....

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