As I rustle through the Arby’s bag
looking for the cherry croissant, and a line from a movie runs through my
mind……I will find you, and I will eat
you. I don’t have much but what I do have is a certain skill set that will make
you wish you had not hid (spoken like Liam Neesom in Taken)…..I have grown
to understand that I have an eating disorder, and that at least I can joke
about It myself.
I found the pastry in the bag, and I
ate it.
I have been so busy lately that I haven’t been
able to let the world into my head and that may be a good thing because it is dangerous,
but not as dangerous as having a cherry turn-over hiding. I am back full swing
into work and this week has been HORRIBLE. Let me put it to you this way, I’d
rather been a sex worker this week. I say this because Sex workers make their
own hours, choose their own clientele, make their own prices, etc. and I feel
like perhaps I could have made more money that way this week.
Today was just as busy as the rest
of the week without the work and illness. I have faced yet another OR demon and
lived. What to do when you have diarrhea and you are at work, in scrubs, and can’t
leave the room….The answer is simple and succinct: Pray you don’t have to bend
over. Not only did I work quite a bit but I was also “under the weather” with a
mysterious stomach bug that only caused pain for days and in the final hours of
a 19 hour shift in the OR, finally materialized into diarrhea. The kind that
brought on cold chills and you literally could feel the fluid shift occurring
in your colon. The kind of happening that could cause one to have an “accident”
if you catch my drift.
After all that I had to get up,
stomach cramps and all and go to a benefit Tea that I look forward to every
year. This year I took not only Charleigh Joe, but also my beautiful niece
Karrah Belle. My sister in law Megan accompanied us and made sure that we
behaved. We met up with my mother and had lunch and then we came home. I was
prepared to take a small nap and then I felt the twinge that I know so well, a
kidney stone. I was almost in tears when I took my Flomax.
After a 30 minute “lie down” I got
up and touched up my hair and makeup to hurry and attend the wedding to the
year. I was running wide open on the interstate to get to the Duke-Cunanan
wedding and I cried like a little girl the entire time they spoke their vows.
It was beautiful and Carol was the most beautiful bride. I am so happy for them.
Best wishes for a happy and charmed live for the Duke’s.
On the ride home from the wedding,
that was when I spotted and Arby’s and felt like killing a turnover. I love
weddings and hate them at the same time. I love the ritual and hope they bring,
but I hate the fact that I see everyone else looking so good and I feel like
the pastry hunter. I look at how everyone else seems to look so good and I look
like I came for the food.
Abdominal pain, diarrhea, kidney
stones, formal events, this week has been bittersweet. I’m sure you are
wondering what the sweet part is….I say it’s the turnover.
I publish this “posthumously” as the
stomach virus progressively got worse. It snowballed and I discovered that I did
have intercostal spaces as they are sore from heaving. I nearly died, I cannot
believe that I have lived through what I have. I now know what my “dry weight”
is….I’m not impressed.
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