So, I just got home from work and I am so exhausted. I came home and Jeremy met me at the car ready to carry my things and he had my supper plate ready. He's so good to me.
The kids are in bed and I will be soon, right after I give everyone a lesson on the Southern Belle's guide to talking about another female. Its the "Bless your heart" method. Any self respecting Southern woman is taught this from an early age from listening to their grandmothers and mothers gossip about their peers.
It is a well know fact that you can say horrible things about someone and even to their best friend, just as long as you add the disclaimer, "Bless her heart". For some reason it makes the statement one of empathy and understanding. For instance, "Jeri Lynn smells like ass and cat food, bless her heart." That last part makes it OK to say horrible things about Jeri Lynn.
Just today, a friend and co-worker was venting about a friend of her families and she was quite angry. She was angry enough to swear, which is unlike her. I listened intently and let her vent as sometimes it truly helps, and sometimes you just need to listen and nod. She told me how horrible this person was, how judgemental she was giving me examples to explain her rationale and then she said:
Jess: "She's one of those with back pain and on disability."
I nodded, listening while continuing my work and she continued
Jess: "I'll tell you what's wrong with her, she's fat and lazy!"
I keep listening the way a good friend does, and she looks me right in the face and throws her hand up and says,
Jess: "But you're not lazy."
I didn't even get a "Bless your heart"! She immediately realized what she had done and we all got a laugh out of it.
I hope she doesn't get mad when she sees the word BITCH carved out on her car with a key, bless her heart.
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