Saturday, September 21, 2013

Nursing was meant for me!

One of the benefits of working in the medical field is definitely some of the situations you get to see. Not necessarily dealing with actual patient care, but to see how and what people think is acceptable.

I have worked in a hospital since 1992, and a lot sure has changed or at least I think so. One thing that has not changed is the fact if you don't laugh, you'd cry.

In all the years I have worked, there are some things that remain the same.

  • All security guards are either so old they are at risk for breaking a hip, or they are too young to buy a beer.

  • The lunch room ladies are the nicest people in the place.

  • There is always one nurse who is always pregnant.

  • There is always one patient you WISH would sign out against medical advice.

  • You can love someone and yet hate to work with them

  • The mispronunciations are almost worth working for free!

  • It is possible to hurt your back helping a 80lb old woman to the bedside commode (not realizing she is dragging the bedside table with you)


I say this because I have had some great laughs at the descriptions and explanations I have heard over the years.
  • I have had a woman tell me something was  with her penis.....

  • A woman who was going through the minnow pond (menopause)

  • When your patient refers to their med by its street name, they probably didn't get it by prescription eg. Hydro's or Xanax bars

  • When list Haldol (antipsychotic) as an allergy but deny any psychiatric problems, I'm probably not going to believe you.

  • When you list EVERYTHING as an allergy, I know you are psych

  • When you list NSAIDS, Tylenol, Codeine,Hydrocodone, Oxycodone as allergies, I know you want Dilaudid....
 
  • When you rate your pain 10/10 while you are crushing candy, I don't believe you. ...

  • I know you set your cell phone alarm to remind you every 4 hours to call for your pain medication....

  • I know when you are taking your 4th shower for the day you are smoking in the bathroom....

  • People will shit in just about anything, the bed, the trash can, the sink, etc. (not kidding)

  • The biggest motivator to get some people out of bed are the 2 N's (nicotine and narcotics)..thanks mom

I don't know why after all these years I still think of these things and am amazed at the audacity of some of our patients. But still, I love my career. I have gotten quite attached to some of these patients despite it all. I was meant for this, and I proudly wear my badge.

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