I'm too sexy.....

          

Another weekend down and everyone is still alive. I calculated per the school calendar that my children have received 2 days of education in the last 36….really? I hope they get a curve on their grades if you know what I mean. Jeremy and I have turned the other direction on the snow days shit. I hope it continues to snow and they have to go to school all summer.

          Cooper has decided that we need another child. He told me he wants a baby brother. I ask him and he said that moms and dads who are awesome get babies. Well, that’s kind of true….wink, wink. Although I’d like to think that I’ve been awesome MORE than 4 times in my adult life.

 Good luck with that Cooper, if I end up pregnant one of two things will happen. Either Dr. Moore will receive a visit or I will have some explaining to do, either way it won’t be a “happy” time for the Neville’s. Social services would be here before we even arrived home from the hospital as we have too many people in a small space. I would need them to install cameras just for the safety of the children. You know how sometimes when you get too many animals in a cage and they begin to eat each other? I’ve got some hungry looking folks here.

          I’m sorry about the negativity of my last post. Sometimes I can’t smile through the anger. Sometimes I just want to kick someone’s windshield out of their car or ride them to the ground like sea biscuit. I can’t and sometimes I just get mad. I thought that this post should have some humor to offset the last:

1.     I can poop in public (not in like the aisle or anything, just in a public restroom), it doesn’t bother me.

2.    I think I’m an awesome dancer, especially when I’m drinking.

3.    I have a full length fur coat, and I’ve worn it.

4.   I hate when people eat one thing at a time. What is the difference?

5.    I was born without a waist…it’s a disability

6.   Bitches who squat and piss all over the toilet are going to Hell.

7.   I am secretly jealous of crafty Pinterest people

8.    Deep down, I miss the perm…

9.    I wish I had a bubble butt.

10.                       And finally, I sleep with 5 pillows. I’m propped up like a nursing home patient and I like it…

I’m back on track and feeling good. Work, school, kids, whatever, bring it on because I’m ready. I can poop in public, I’m an awesome dancer, and deep down I know how sexy I really am.